It took four years forTrack45’s deeply personal new single “When I Grow Up” to materialize, but many more years for the feelings behind the song to simmer within the soul of KK Johnson.
“Simmeris actually the perfect word,” says KK Johnson, 27, in a revealing interview with PEOPLE. “This song has gone on a journey, and we’ve rewritten and written and rerecorded and worked on the song for a long time, probably four years trying to get it right.”
Indeed, the country sibling trio made up of siblings Ben, Jenna and KK Johnson all agree that from the beginning, “When I Grow Up” was always the type of song they wanted to take their time with, in the hopes that they could get itright.
Because ultimately, it was KK Johnson’s story to tell.
“You never really think about it when you’re young … that some of the people who are your friends aren’t going to be there forever,” says KK Johnson, whose memories of a high school friend that experienced “severe suicidal thoughts” ultimately was the driving creative factor behind “When I Grow Up.” “When you’re younger, the gravity of a situation doesn’t even really hit you until you’re looking back at it.”
Track45.Kevin Grace
Kevin Grace
Indeed, as the touching lyrics of “When I Grow Up” play out, they tell an agonizing story taken from KK Johnson’s past, when a high school friend would confide in her about the dark thoughts she was battling.
“It was a lot to carry as a kid,” reflects KK Johnson. “I definitely felt like I couldn’t talk about it with anyone.”
But she did find a way to tell her brother and sister.
“I remember KK saying, ‘I don’t know what to say,” adds Jenna Johnson, 32, of her sister’s plight. “She kept on saying, ‘I don’t know what to do. How do I make things better?’ I think just sitting with someone and just talking to them and being there, so they don’t feel alone is so important. You don’t always have to try to fix things.”
Track45.Alysse Gafkjen
Alysse Gafkjen
And while the years have passed since those dark conversations with her high school friend, the lessons KK Johnson learned during that time remain.
“I think the reason that we are putting this song out is because so many people go through similar situations like this and feel alone and feel isolated,” says KK Johnson, who alongside her Track45 bandmates released their deeply personal EPGrew Up Onearlier this year. “And that’s the worst feeling in the world, especially when you’re young. I’m not the only one who’s ever felt these things or had someone known someone who’s felt these things. I think that so many people are going to be able to hear their own story in this song.”
But at the same time, it’s not a song with all the answers.
“It’s not instructional inany way,” continues KK Johnson, who wrote the song with the help of her Track45 bandmates along with fellow songwriters Jonny Price and Jaida Dryer. “This song is purely saying, you’re not alone in this situation. And hopefully hearing the song can give people in the situation or who have ever felt this way feel less alone and less isolated, and they can talk about it and feel freed in a way.”
Certainly, “When I Grow Up” does deal with a situation that might have not been so freely discussed within the course of a three-minute song years ago, at a time when the stigma surrounding mental health remained.
“At the end of the day, we make music to connect with people,” concludes KK Johnson. “Even though [‘When I Grow Up’] is a very heavy and dark song, there is still hope inside of there, and hopefully that comes across.”
source: people.com
