Over the last few months, Georgia, Ohio, Kentucky, Mississippi, Utah and Arkansashave all passed “heartbeat bills,” which ban abortions once an embryo or fetus heartbeat can be detected. Last week, Alabama legislators passed an even stricter bill effectivelybanning all abortionsat any point in pregnancy, causing a wave of women — including stars likeBusy Philipps,Minka Kelly,April Love Geary,Milla Jovovich,Amber TamblynandTess Holliday— to share their own stories. The heartbeat bills, along with Alabama’s new law, are a violation of the 14th amendment, which the Supreme Court determined in the landmark Roe v. Wade case. Anti-abortion lawmakers hope that these bills will lead to lawsuits and eventually head to the Supreme Court, wherethe newly conservative benchcould reverse 1973’s Roe v. Wade decision.
Married at First SightalumandHot Marriage. Cool Parentspodcast host Jamie Otis, 32 — who has been candid about growing up in extreme poverty — talked to PEOPLE about the reasons behind her decision to have two abortions when she was younger. In thelatest episode of her podcast, Otis opens up further about her difficult decisions.
I guarantee you any woman who has ever had an abortion will forever remember it for the rest of her life. It’s not something you do lightly.
Jamie Otis with her sisters Johanna Harvey and Amylynn Lucas.
Jamie Otis with her sister Amylynn.
Fast-forward to a little bit later, and my mom became a full-blown drug addict. She had gone through so many hardships, and her only coping mechanism was drugs. I felt like I was living in a hellhole, to be honest. We lived in a trailer that had leaky ceilings with doors that wouldn’t shut all the way and windows that were duct-taped. But the hardest part was that my mom was gone. She left us for weeks at a time and we were just teenagers and kids fending for ourselves.
Jamie Otis with her sister Amylynn Lucas. “I just did her hair and makeup for her first prom,” says Otis, who was dressed for her waitressing job.
Jamie Otis’s sisters Amylynn and Leah King. “I just got paid and had a little extra money to afford store-bought treats,” recalls Otis. “As you can tell from their smiles, that didn’t happen often.”.Courtesy of Jamie Otis
My abortions were a secret I kept to myself for nearly my whole life. I hated myself for a very long time for it, and I know the stones people will throw at me: Why didn’t I use birth control better? Why wasn’t I more careful? But the thing is, it happened to me and continues to happen to couples. You can throw stones at me if you want, but I just think of a young woman who has no one to turn to. I wish someone had said to me back then that I’m not evil. I felt like a terrible, selfish human being and sometimes I still do. I don’t want to admit that out loud, but it’s just a hard fact. But at the end of the day when I sit down and think about my life now with my daughter and husband Doug, I think about the fact that I wouldn’t have my daughter Henley if I had gone down that path where I had two children with two men who were not fit to be fathers. I forgive myself for having to make that choice.
Kevin & Aly Photography
AfterDoug and I got married, I knew my abortions were something he needed to know about me before we started our own family. My palms were sweaty when I told him. I knew this revelation could change things. But Doug’s reaction couldn’t have been more loving and supportive. He said, “I’m so sorry you had to make this decision so young. That was so brave of you.” He saw my decisions from a point of view that was so completely different from mine.
I know I’m going to get backlash for opening up about my past. Like I said, my abortions still torment me and I hate that I had to have them. However, am I thankful? Of course. I wouldn’t be able to be a good mother to my daughter right now or have been able to be a good parent to my siblings back then. The cycle continues because there’s not enough education about sex and birth control, and not enough support. There’s not enough constructive discussion about abortion. It sucks. It really sucks. But the truth of the matter is it is a necessary option.
I’m so proud ofwomen like Busy Philippswho have spoken up about their abortions because no one is proud of it. When she was brave and bold enough to speak out, it stirred in me an emotion that I need to do the same. For the woman right now who is struggling and feels that she has no one on her side, know that you’re not alone and you’re not evil. We women need to band together—men too—and support each other.
source: people.com
